Apparently I’m a shit daughter and bailed out on my mom because I left California to come back to Michigan for my best friends funeral. 

I mean…are you fucking kidding me?! And the bitch who told this to me, doesn’t even know me or my mother. She’s been friends with her for four years and all of a sudden she knows our whole past together. I don’t think so. I trusted my mother. I put my life in her hands. I ran away from home for her, and what did she do in return? Left with no notice. She abandoned me with no goodbye or explanation and never contacted any of her family for almost a year. I didn’t know if she was dead, or just hated me. I cried every fucking night over that. THAT’S bailing on a person. On a family member. 

Me moving back to Michigan because my best friend fucking died? That is not bailing. I call my mom every day. I talk to her on facebook every day. I am fucking dead inside because I lost my best friend, but I still manage to hold it together to let my mom know that I’m still alive and well. But no, that’s not good enough. I’m a bad daughter because I left. 

Fuck you! I am so pissed right now! How dare she say those things to me! I have never been so furious in my life. My mother is a big girl, she can take care of herself. I’ve tried helping her multiple times. I have put my whole life on hold for far too long because of her. She is a selfish woman and used me. Used my love and affection to cover up her addiction. She was never there for me, I was always there for her. I would give my life to save hers, but apparently I’m still a bad daughter. 

I mean…what the fuck is wrong with people. How can people say such shitty things to other people like that?! No one has no idea how much Amanda’s death has effected me. My heart died when I found out she was dead. I cry every single fucking night because I lost her. I can’t breathe at times, I can’t think at times. I’m always depressed and suicidal. I lost my best fucking friend, and some bitch who has no idea about my life, decides to tell me that because I went to her funeral, I’m a bad fucking daughter.

rawlofogus replied to your post: I’ve just had a revelation.

same. *high fives* /hugs you -gives you a banana- :tickles thee:

Well of course I have you friend. You always know how to get me to crack a smile. *hugs*

I am completely and utterly alone.